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Holding space for you in a session is the experience of having someone solely focused on your needs, wants and desires. It is also about creating a space, a container where you can feel safe to be yourself and free to express whatever feelings or emotions come up. It is a unique and rare experience because there are very few times when experiencing pleasure with someone where it does not come with the expectations of reciprocity. There is nothing wrong with mutually satisfying each other. But there is a lot to say for getting undivided personal attention. Especially when it comes to intimacy and getting your erotic needs met. In reality, there are very few situations that provide such an opportunity and very few people willing and capable of providing such an experience. I gladly seek to provide such a space in my BDSM and Bondassage sessions.

The term ‘holding space’ was actually unfamiliar to me. It was a friend and client who explained to me that the unique thing that I was doing in my sessions was called holding space for them. In my sessions I am entirely focused on pleasuring you and creating a safe space where you can freely express your emotions, erotic wants and desires without any expectation beyond what you and I have negotiated. Also, I have very clear boundaries for my sessions which are designed to direct focus on your pleasure, not mine… and they are not to be violated.

I am by nature a giver. So, I am very comfortable with and actually take great enjoyment in holding space for you!

My BDSM ProDom and Bondassage sessions begin with a consultation to create connection, discuss your boundaries and desires. But that connection does not end when our session is over. I purposely make myself available after our session in order to assist you processing your experience. After your session you may have questions or need assistance integrating back into your normal world. A day or two after our session you may experience a little disorientation sometimes know as drop. You may have insecurities, apprehension about the session or even guilt for the pleasures and excitement you experienced. This is normal. There are many physical, spiritual and emotional post effects that can occur after a session that can affect you and your relationships. The opportunity after your session to discuss what you are feeling can be very helpful. I truly care for my clients so don’t hesitate to reach out and schedule a post session Zoom or phone consultation. 

There are many emotional that might surface during a session. My sessions are often playful and fun so it is not unusual for us to laugh or cry together during a session. Sometimes the emotion that may come up for you is anger or rage. This can be a normal consequence of the intended consensual intensity of the session triggering suppressed emotions you might have. Instead of letting you further suppress these feelings I allow you space to push through these emotions by actually allowing you to direct that rage safely towards me. I welcome this in the hope of you being able to release those emotions in a safe space where catharsis is possible. Rage is never ever the goal of my sessions. I simply allow you the opportunity to express your rage should it arise. I am more than physically and emotionally fit enough to absorb your rage.  My job is to monitor, protect and comfort you through that phase of the session. 

Rage, if it erupts can be powerfully expressive but is usually only a small aspect of the session. Once purged the session will generally carry on as usual with you having had the benefit of the cathartic emotional release.